5:35pm

thank god for after work dubies....
i got home to find that i've been abandoned
and the place a mess.
phred did leave note saying that tomorrow
we'll have a dinner date. sorry guy i've got plans.
for the last month i've gone out most every wednesday
with brian after work for drinks and i'm not about to
stop now. he's leaving soon so i'd like to spend the
time with him while he's still around. maybe
i can lure sexy office boy out...
he and i exchanged our woes today.(sexy office boy)
speaking out loud about the different dynamics
of our relationships set off an alarm in my head.
to hear myself actually say that at times i wish i was single
made me really think about the idea of compromise in a relationship
and to what extent do you actually do so ? compromise.
and too what extent? i feel i've given a lot up for the sake of
us lately and i'm happy to do so but i feel that i've haven't
received the support that i've needed. one huge blaring example
is that he's gone out most every night. i really like time myself
and i think its great that we don't have to spend every single waking
hour together but every night?
dam! i just stopped and read what i had written above and now
i've lost the entire momentum i had going on that thought....
*aramat is high*

interesting day. i now sit in the pit.
i was there maybe on and off for an hour & half
today and it was absolute shit. i feel angry about it
and stupid for feeling angry about it. wasted energy
so i must resign myself to the fact that my job
now is starting tosuck . if it wasn't for sexy office boy
today would have been dismal at best.
we had lunch together
drank a couple of beers
together and i baked in
sun it felt wonderful!

OK that's it !

arAmat *just discovered raccoon poo on the balcony*