8:20 am

today is going to be a good day!
it has to be or i think i may start to lose hope.
since i've returned from the cruise i haven't refilled my
extremely expensive anti depressant prescription and i'm starting to feel
crappy again. like almost anything can set me off into a bad or sad mood. but
not today! i'm trying to remain strong and positive. at 2pm i have an
interview at a non profit organization and i should find out today as well if i'll be
working at elections canada. those are my beacons of hope for today.
phred stayed home sick today. its nice that he's home but i feel like i'm walking
on egg shells lately with him. i don't have my half of the rent, my unemployment has run
out and i feel at moment he may start yelling at me. i'm not sure why but for the last
few days i've felt that. when it comes to hard times like these i want to shrink away from him, i don't want to talk about it i just want to run in the opposite direction and i find that slightly alarming. something is definitely up. we haven't even had sex since i've returned! i'm almost positive that he got a little something on the side when i was gone.... he better put out soon i'm horny.

araMAT